Illya Nickovetch Kuryakin stood straight and tall with his chin up as he adjusted his naval hat atop his head. Not looking at his partner, he asked, "How do I look?"

Napoleon Solo, hands in his pockets, slowly made a 180-degree circle around him, tilting his head to one side as he inspected every inch of his Russian partner before seating himself on the corner of his desk. "I do so love a man in uniform," he murmured.

This brought a smirk to the face of the blond Russian as he stood there decked out in his naval officer's uniform. Their latest assignment would take them both to his homeland and, in Illya's opinion, the uniform was insurance.

Folding his arms across his chest, Napoleon gazed worriedly at the handsome figure his partner made. Recently their partnership had taken a more intimate turn - it was still too new, too fragile and so far secret. Six months ago, he'd almost lost Illya due to a senseless mistake on the part of another agent. He'd come to realize just how much the reticent Russian meant to him. Telling Illya had been the hardest part, but once Illya overcame his initial disbelief, everything fell into place. While Napoleon was willing to shout it from the top of the highest building, Illya was more cautious.

Trying not to let the worry he felt about this mission show, Napoleon asked indignantly, "Why don't I ever get to wear a uniform?"

When Illya reached over and placed his hand over his heart, Napoleon was somewhat surprised.

"Napoleon, you need no uniform," he said affectionately. He flashed his special shy smile, the one that always made Solo want to reach over and kiss him senseless. He tenderly cupped his hand to Illya's cheek as he reached to cover the hand that currently lay over his heart.

Mary Ann Williams of U.N.C.L.E.'s Transportation Department chose that moment to enter Napoleon's office with a folder containing tickets and visas relating to their current case. Illya's back was to her, but the tender look on the face of the suave Napoleon Solo was enough to give the whole show away. She froze, her face turning to stone, as she handed the folder to Solo before briskly walking out the door.

Napoleon noticed the look on her face and, gently removing Illya's hand, he hurried after her muttering, "I'll be right back," to Illya. He watched her as she walked stiffly down the hall and cleared his throat before calling in his command voice, "Miss Williams?"

She stopped and turned around, her face and voice cold. "Yes, Mr. Solo?"

He took in her demeanor and in a hard voice said, "I would hate to think that whatever you saw would be subject to gossip. You should know that I'll do whatever I have to in order to protect Illya."

Miss Williams crossed her arms, her jaw tight. "Is that a threat?"

"No, Mary Ann, it's not a threat. I know it's hard for you to understand, but I just wanted to impress upon you..." Napoleon closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Illya is very special and would be very hurt if..." He stopped.

"Are you going to deny it?" Mary Ann demanded.

His relationship with Illya was not tawdry and he was damned if he was going to lie about it. Napoleon looked down at the floor before bringing his gaze back to Mary Ann's face. "No," he said softly.

Her expression turned uncertain. "Just how much does he mean to you?"

Napoleon looked away before earnestly saying, "He's my heart."

The sincerity of his answer made Mary Ann pause. The fact that the great Napoleon Solo, the man who had bedded more than half of U.N.C.L.E.'s female staff, was having an affair with his male partner was a shock. But it wasn't as if they'd been... Mary Ann shut her eyes. It was best not to let her thoughts go there. She and several other female employees of U.N.C.L.E. were all rivals for Napoleon's affections, and she was now finding that the thought of him bestowing those affections on his male partner was not quite so disturbing as she had first thought. In fact it was sort of...sweet. Her expression softened. "I promise."

Napoleon's eyes brightened as he took her hand and raised it to his lips. "Thank you."

At that very moment, Illya came out of the office while going through the folder and took in the sight before going to stand next to his partner.

Mary Ann, blushing, turned away and left to go back to her work.

The two men started down the hall toward the exit. Illya stared straight ahead as he asked, "What was that all about?"

Napoleon answered absentmindedly, "Oh, nothing."

Illya gave him a sideways glance. "You are a terrible liar, Napoleon."

Napoleon smiled lightly as he replied, "Only with you."

The satisfied smile stayed on Illya's face till they reached the airport.

It was going to be a long flight to the USSR and both men had been lucky that their seats were in first class. They felt they were adequately prepared for the mission. Illya was to be the main player and Napoleon was going along as backup. The only real problem, Illya felt, was the fact that he would have to keep his hands off of Napoleon for the duration of the mission. It would be a great hardship indeed.

Eventually, the cabin's lights were lowered and the stewardesses passed around blankets and pillows to the passengers. As Illya took his pillow and blanket, he acquired a wicked gleam in his eyes that Napoleon did not notice. Turning his body so he was facing his partner, he pretended to go to sleep. When he felt Napoleon was asleep, he worked his hand under the blanket covering his partner and ran his hand up Napoleon's thigh. Napoleon's eyes popped open at the touch and he turned to look at the blond Russian with surprise.

"Now, Napoleon, you don't want to make a scene, do you?" Illya said wickedly as he put pressure on the now-hardening cock beneath his fingers.

Napoleon closed his eyes with a moan. Those fingers were driving him crazy when suddenly they stilled and pulled away. He opened his eyes to see the stewardess peering at him. "Are you all right, sir? Can I get you anything?"

"No, no, thank you," he said with a weak smile before turning a glare on his partner.

Illya merely turned the other way and let out a soft chuckle.

Napoleon grudgingly got up out of his seat, adjusting his jacket to cover his obvious erection. "I'll get you for this," he muttered before going to the bathroom to relieve himself. After a while he came back to his seat only to find Illya fast asleep.

"Wicked Russian," he grumbled as he sat down.

Illya kept his eyes closed and smirked. "Yes, I know."

The mission had gone smoothly - or as smoothly as can be expected considering the circumstances. Illya was feeling very tense, almost as if he expected someone to board the plane any moment and drag him off to the nearest gulag. Napoleon had been unusually quiet during this time. As the plane took off, Illya let out a sigh of relief and turned to give a considering look to his partner. "Napoleon, is something bothering you?"

Napoleon was studying the crease in his trousers. "No." He looked into Illya's concerned eyes. "It's just that you're so...different when you're in that uniform."

"Different? How?"

He appeared to consider. "You're more cold and impersonal...not like the man I..." He didn't say 'love,' but it was exactly what he meant.

Illya looked away. "It means nothing. It's just protective camouflage necessary for survival," he said harshly. He was having trouble making the transition back from Russian Naval Officer to U.N.C.L.E. agent and it was making him very tense.

Napoleon leaned back with a sigh. He supposed he would just have to wait it out. He knew one way to ease his partner's tensions, but Illya had insisted on no public displays of affection. Suddenly Napoleon sat up just a little straighter. That was a rule Illya had already broken. With a satisfied smile, Napoleon knew what he was going to do: it was just a matter of timing.

The time had come. The lights had been lowered and blankets and pillows had been passed out. Napoleon turned his body to face his partner's as he reached into his jacket pocket for his handkerchief. When he was quite sure Illya was asleep, he reached over to burrow his hand under the blanket and unzipped Illya's pants. Illya nearly jumped out of his seat when he felt Napoleon pull his penis out.

"Now, now, Illya, you don't want to make a scene, do you?" Napoleon chided softly. "Spread your legs, love."

Illya glared at Napoleon but did as he was bid.

Napoleon sat there, his eyes half open with a smile on his face as he worked the swelling organ with his hand. Illya was trying hard not to show any expression on his face but wasn't quite succeeding. His kept his eyes shut as he bit his lip to keep from moaning. It was all Illya could do to keep from thrusting into the hand working him. Soon Napoleon could tell the task was nearly done and he used his handkerchief to trap the semen as it came shooting out.

Illya sat there making deep gasping sounds as the orgasm hit him. When he was able to focus again, it was a smug Napoleon that he saw. "You are an evil American. Is there anything I can do for you?"

Napoleon just shook his head, wishing he could plant a kiss on those tempting lips. "I'll be fine." He got up out of his seat to go to the men's room and alleviate his own problem himself as well as getting rid of the handkerchief.

"Why don't we stop at Headquarters and drop off our report?" Napoleon asked as he put his suitcase in the back of the car. "Then we can go to my place to get you out of that uniform."

Illya looked at Napoleon over the top of the car. "I thought you loved a man in uniform?"

"Oh, I do. But I love him even better out of it," Napoleon replied as he got behind the wheel.

Illya hid a smile as he slid in beside his partner and they started off.

They pulled up in front of Del Floria's and entered U.N.C.L.E. Headquarters. Their first stop was Mr. Waverly's office. Lisa Rogers was sitting at her desk outside his office and informed them, "I'm sorry, but Mr. Waverly won't be able to see you for at least twenty minutes."

"That's okay. It will give me time to go change," Illya said with a smile.

Lisa, her arms crossed on top of the desk, asked, "So, Napoleon, how was Russia?"

Napoleon hitched himself on the corner of her desk. "Cold, very cold."

A typical Napoleon statement. Illya couldn't help but smile as he continued down the hall.

Mary Ann had just slipped into the office as the two agents were finishing their verbal reports. She silently went behind Mr. Waverly to drop off a folder he had asked for.

Mr. Waverly, puffing away on his pipe, asked, "What's this I hear about you and Mr. Kuryakin engaging in a so-called love affair?"

Mary Ann froze before straightening up in surprise. She looked at Napoleon to see him glaring angrily at her. Shaking her head she mouthed, "I swear, I never..."

"Mr. Solo, you needn't glare at Miss Williams like that. I do have other sources." At this point Mary Ann made a quick exit. "Now, what I want to know is: are you two engaged in illicit behavior?"

Napoleon looked over at Illya, whose face was extremely pale. "Ah, could you rephrase that question just a bit... sir?"

Mr. Waverly glared at him.

"I don't happen to consider what Illya and I have as illicit."

Mr. Waverly sighed. "I'll take that as a yes, then. I would never have expected such behavior from two of U.N.C.L.E.'s top Enforcement agents. Unfortunately, this will require some thought. You are both suspended for three days pending review."

The two men got up at the dismissal, their faces solemn. Mary Ann and Lisa were talking quietly but both men ignored them as they continued to walk down the hall and out of U.N.C.L.E.

Napoleon leaned against the door after shutting it and setting the alarm to his apartment. He felt the warmth of Illya's body against his back as the Russian's arms wrapped around him.

"I'm sorry, Napoleon," Illya told him, resting his head on Napoleon's shoulder.

Napoleon turned and looked into those troubled blue eyes. "You sorry? I don't think you've ever been sorry for anything since the day we started working together. In fact, I didn't even know the word was in your vocabulary," he quipped with amusement.

The troubled eyes brightened and the corners of Illya's mouth quirked up as he responded, "You're right, of course." His expression changed and turned serious. "It's just that this is not a very good time-"

"It's never a good time," Napoleon agreed with a sigh. "However, I remember something I said about getting you out of uniform." He turned and grabbed Illya, holding him at arm's length as he looked him over.

"Napoleon, in case you haven't noticed, I am no longer wearing a uniform." Illya shook his head, his eyes dancing in delight.

"Technicalities," Napoleon responded as he pulled his partner into the bedroom with plans to ravish him at the earliest possible moment.

Illya hung back. "Maybe we shouldn't?" Now that Mr. Waverly knew, he couldn't help but feel that any action of this nature could only hurt them.

"We might as well be hung for a lion as a lamb," Napoleon argued as he brought him closer to the bed and started to help Illya out of his clothing.

"I have never understood that saying," was all Illya got to say before Napoleon pulled him close for a deep and passionate kiss. Their mouths dueled for control, causing their bodies to ignite.

It was with great difficulty that Napoleon pulled away to take off his jacket and loosen his tie. His hands trembled with desire as he hurriedly removed his clothing, never taking his eyes off the body of his lover.

Illya stood there taking in not only Napoleon's gaze, but also the words he had spoken. This could well be the last time they made love, he thought as he bit his lower lip. Why not go all the way and make this time special? With a wicked gleam in his eye, he turned and headed for the bathroom in search of the one item that would make this a little easier.

"Hey, where are you going?" Napoleon called out to him.

"You'll see," he called back before re-entering the bedroom.

A now-nude Napoleon lay in bed as he placed his watch on the nightstand. Illya climbed in behind Napoleon and ran his hands lightly down the narrow hips, caressing his skin. He felt Napoleon's body ripple with desire under his hands. He ran his hands over Napoleon's firm ass, before taking the lotion he had found in the bathroom and pouring some onto his fingers.

Napoleon lay on his side enjoying the caresses, and was somewhat surprised when a cool digit entered him. "What the fuck...?" he gasped, startled, as he turned to look over his shoulder.

"An appropriate choice of words," Illya said sardonically as he considered his next action. "Napoleon, I know we've never..." He stopped, unable to continue, but his eyes silently asked for permission.

Napoleon considered what Illya wanted and nodded. He could feel Illya using first one finger and then another to stretch him, and he couldn't resist moaning at the enticing feeling of it hitting his prostate.

Illya withdrew his fingers to apply the cool lotion to his swollen erection. Returning to his position behind Napoleon, he gently licked his shoulder before biting it to mask any pain that Napoleon might feel as he entered him.

Napoleon cried out as he felt pain in two locations at once. He shook as he was entered slowly and smoothly. The pain soon melted into feelings of pleasure as he reacted to the sensation of being filled.

Illya paused to savor the feeling of Napoleon's muscles contracting around his cock before thrusting deeper. The action got rougher as Napoleon, gasping in ecstasy, pushed back hard against him. The feeling of being inside Napoleon was intoxicating. He reached one hand around to wrap around Napoleon's leaking cock and started pumping it in rhythm to his thrusts. Napoleon's cock soon let loose its load. As he shuddered with completion, the feeling of pleasure drove Illya to the edge and soon he too came, flooding his partner.

After taking a few minutes to catch his breath, Illya slipped out and rolled over. "Are you okay?" he asked Napoleon.

Napoleon turned over, his body still shaky from being possessed, and gazed at him affectionately. "Just how long have you been wanting to do that?" he asked as he pulled Illya close before closing his eyes as exhaustion took over.

"A long, long time."

Later that night, Illya lay there staring up at the ceiling.

Napoleon looked at him questioningly.

"I will probably be sent back to Russia," Illya remarked.

Napoleon grunted as he got up and went over to the safe near his bed. Once he opened the safe, he started tossing stacks of bills behind him, causing them to land on the bed with Illya.

Illya looked at the pile of bills in amazement, "Napoleon, where did you...? When did you...? Why?"

Napoleon climbed back onto bed. "Okay, where? I liquidated all my holdings except for the Pursang. There's 150,000 dollars there. When? Last month. Why? Do you really have to ask? It's yours should worse come to worse. I want you to take it and the Pursang and get as far away as you can."

"No, I won't do it." Illya pushed the money back at Napoleon. "Not without you."

"Illya, the money will go much further..." Napoleon sighed, but Illya had turned away. "Please."

Illya was not having any of it. "We sink or swim together," he stated.

Napoleon tried another tactic. He moved behind his lover and slowly worked his hands over Illya's body in that way he knew made him crazy. He turned Illya so he was flat on the bed and began kissing his way down his chest, licking first one nipple then the other. Illya trembled beneath him as Napoleon continued his ministrations. He gave each nipple a last nip before going down to the now very aroused organ and taking it in his mouth, sucking away until Illya arched his body and came, flooding his mouth with his seed. He lay there holding the Russian's body, giving him time to recover. Soon they both fell back asleep.

Napoleon awoke when he heard sounds coming from his kitchen and realized he was alone in his bed. Pulling on his robe, he went in search of his partner. A most erotic sight caught his eye as he entered the kitchen. A very naked Russian was helping himself to some fresh coffee. Napoleon came up behind him and wrapped his arms around him in a gentle hug.

Illya smiled as one of the hands went down to cup his groin. "Would you care for a cup of coffee, Napoleon?"

Napoleon began nibbling Illya's neck while his hand worked the lax organ, causing it to grow harder. "I think I'll just enjoy you first." Touching Illya's compact body was exciting him greatly.

Illya started thrusting into Napoleon's hand. His body trembled as he leaned back against Napoleon and looked down at the hand milking him. When he was close, he couldn't resist muttering in a raspy voice, "This is not the sort of creme I wish in my coffee."

With a laugh, Napoleon used his free hand to take the cup from Illya's hand and set it on the counter while he finished bringing Illya to the brink and beyond.

Forty-eight hours later, they were back at Headquarters. Not knowing if they were ever going to have another chance, they had made the most of those forty-eight hours and they were extremely tired. As they walked down the hall lined with secretaries they couldn't help but notice a number of Section Two agents standing around the water cooler.

The agent doing the most talking was one Rick Richards, formerly with the CIA. While a competent agent, Richards was a thorough asshole. When Napoleon and Illya made to move past them, Richards moved to block them from going further.

"Well, if it isn't the two resident fags. I suppose you two have been getting it on while you were gone?"

Nobody noticed as one of the secretaries picked up her phone and murmured, "DK one-Richards."

"Listen, Richards, if you have a problem-" Napoleon started to say angrily when Illya moved to stop him.

"Napoleon, pay no attention to him. He's not worth it."

Richards face reddened as he started toward Illya. "Why, you commie queer-"

Everyone turned as high-heeled footsteps could be heard striding down the hall. Karen Dulls from Accounting was advancing with a large folder.

"Mr. Richards, I have here two years worth of expenditures and, unless you can verify all the charges circled in red, any excesses will be taken out of your salary."

Richards looked at the huge folder she had thrust into his hands. "Huh?"

Miss Dulls turned and looked at all the other agents standing around. "Would anyone else like to have their expense reports audited?"

As one, all the agents shook their heads.

"Good," she said as she turned to go back the way she came, but not before winking at Napoleon and giving the thumbs up to the secretary who had made the call. Operation Defend Kuryakin was a major success.

****

Napoleon and Illya entered Mr. Waverly's office in a somber state.

"Sit down, gentlemen," Mr. Waverly said gruffly. "I have been going over your records of the past year. I don't know when this 'relationship' of yours began, but I can't see how it has in any way affected your performance."

Both men let out a sigh of relief.

"However," he continued, "I see no reason for U.N.C.L.E. to maintain two residences when one will suffice. Report to Section Six for your new accommodation. I expect you both to vacate your current residences and move immediately. After all, we're not made out of money here. Now off with you," he said with a slight twinkle in his eye.

Napoleon and Illya looked at each other in surprise and said, "Yes, sir," as they got up to obey Mr. Waverly's order.

Once they were out the door, Napoleon turned to Illya. "I wonder what sort of accommodations we'll get."

"Nothing good, I'm sure," replied the dour Russian.

Miss Rogers looked up. "Oh, I wouldn't worry about that," she said with a knowing smile.